What can we learn from how others see the world? This column peers through different lenses, exploring how ideas and perspectives might be woven into coaching and mentoring Eve Turner
The harsh yet wise truths of a classic novel can teach us all we need to know about emotional intelligence
…”Atticus was right. One time he said you never really know a man until you stand in his shoes and walk around in them. Just standing on the Radley porch was enough.”
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird (p305)
Like many I had seen the 1962 film of Harper Lee’s famous book, starring Gregory Peck and Brock Peters. But I’d never read the book until my son studied it for his English Literature GCSE in 2007. Set in the Deep South of 1930s America, a black man, Tom Robinson, who has been wrongly charged with the rape of a white girl, is defended by a white lawyer, Atticus Finch.
It’s a rich story that works on many levels, with other key characters including Atticus’s daughter Scout and son Jem, and a reclusive next-door neighbour, Boo Radley.
For me there is a sub-text around empathy, and it is one I have shared with clients who have struggled to understand what empathy is.
Empathy
Over my years as a coach I have explored with clients what it means to really lead, to take different perspectives and treat each person as an individual to get the best out of them. I may never use the phrase ’emotional intelligence,’ but sometimes I have found referring clients
to this novel really makes the essence of emotional intelligence come alive for them,
as in this snippet of conversation between Atticus and Scout:
“First of all,” he said, “if you can learn a simple trick, Scout, you’ll get along better with all kinds of folks. You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view -”
“Sir?”
” – until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” (p31)
Changing habits
At the start of the book Jem and Scout want to make Boo Radley “come out” (p13) while wondering if he actually exists. Atticus explains to Jem that it is Boo Radley’s choice to stay inside his house:
“What Mr Radley did might seem peculiar to us, but it did not seem peculiar to him.” (p53)
Of course this concept is not new to us, coaching in the 21st century, but I find compelling the power and compassion with which Harper Lee is making the point that we can live more fulfilling lives if we can only understand other perspectives.
And she was writing this at a time when there was still deep division half a century ago. Near the end of the book, when Boo Radley has saved Scout’s life, Scout and her father have to decide whether to accept the sheriff’s decision on how to describe events. This would protect both Jem and Boo from further questions.
In a moving scene it’s Scout’s wisdom, drawn from her father’s lessons, that prevails, understanding that the life Boo values would be lost if he is placed under public scrutiny. Earlier in the book she has learned from her father it is a sin to kill a mockingbird and she says:
“Well, it’d be sort of like shootin’ a mockingbird, wouldn’t it?” (p302)
Coaching
So yes, I have used this in my coaching. But of course this ability is one we all aspire to as coaches as well, so it is a lesson that I continue to remember for myself as I work with clients.
Eve Turner is a qualified and accredited coach, coach supervisor and facilitator.
eve@eve-turner.com
Coaching at Work, Volume 6, Issue 2