Intimacy is seen mostly as a good thing in coaching and mentoring, suggests research unveiled at the European Mentoring& Coaching Council annual conference in Dublin on 18-20 November.
Only 10 per cent of coaches and mentors in research by Sheffield Business School felt intimacy was unhelpful to the learner in coaching and mentoring. There were concerns among respondents about clients becoming too dependent but many had had “good outcomes with high levels of intimacy”, said Lis Merrick, senior lecturer, who led the research.
Half of the respondents cited trust as an element of intimacy. For 20 per cent, rapport was important, while for 20 per cent, closeness and having a special bond was key. Some 14 per cent spoke of respect while 14 per cent mentioned “the dark side of misuse of intimacy”, said Merrick.
She started the research because she was intrigued by a lack of literature on intimacy in coaching and mentoring.
Asked how frequently intimacy occurred in coaching and mentoring, 15 per cent of coaches said more than 50-75 per cent of the time. Half felt it happened sometimes while the remainder felt it was “inappropriate”.
Merrick also asked about degrees of intimacy – 95 per cent of respondents felt there were degrees. Some felt “there is an ebb and flow in intimacy, rather than a static concept”, she said.
Some said they have introduced discord into coaching to avoid it becoming too intimate.
Obstacles include the coach or mentor being too solution-focused, boredom and breaching confidentiality, suggests the research among 25 coaches/mentors.
Merrick hopes to carry on with the research, this time among clients.